this is a space for me to talk about my life and feelings and junk.
its sorta just a whatever the fuck i want. <== go back home
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7/25/17 @2:54 am - its been a few days a few things have gone down. nothing major really just life. im still mostly just hanging out inside listening to music and stuff but thats cool. still walking around
alright mastodon. im fucking sorry but i switched back to twitter. ahah jesus what a fucking loser amirite??? (directed twords myself). but i have a few gripes with mastodon. the number one thing is that its too fucking small jesus christ. there arent enough people and most of the people have nothing in common with me. so im like "wow fuck who do i talk to". like the community is very nice and welcoming but its really a community of programmers and im not really a fucking programmer sorry hun. so i moved back to birdsite because i mean..idk most of the people i care about are on there and it has a bunch of pluses. mastadon kinda felt like a fake kid cell phone version of twitter. like its trying and it does things right but its just not the fucking same.
anyway. today i decided to go back on reddit. i was really never very active on reddit but i used r/homestuck for a while last year. ive since stopped honestly. but today i logged on to stalk someones profile and noticed that you can set up profile now and make posts that arent connected to subreddits. after hearing that i decided im gonna start using plebbit again. ive needed a place to host long form pieces of writing for a little while now. and reddit seems like a good place for that kind of stuff. i also need a new place to discuss my intrests and i think reddit is also a good place to do this. i could probably get engrossed into r/homestuck again honestly and despite all the gripes i have with the sub i have met some good friends there so i dont mind.
speaking of r/homestuck. i fucking love homestuck holy shit. like wow i fucking love homestuck. its just the best. i havent really be into the fandom for the past like...idk 2 months now. i talk about it on discord but i dont do much more than that honestly. id love to get back into classpect theorization and such. maybe even make a short mspfa idk. id just love to do some weird homestuck shit. as i said before i have a gripe with the r/homestuck and the hsd (homestuck discord run by r/homestuck) but i might step foot in the community again. theres shitty people on there but theres also good people. idk im just trying to find a place to hometuck it the fuck up and there arent many places that id like to hang out so yeah. also speaking of homestuck i really wanna make a page on this site for my kidsona's sburb journey. like detailing all his sburb info and stuff. itd be pretty neat if i actually ended up doing it. but idk itd also take some time. for now its a thought.
also on the topic of my internet life, ive decided i kinda wanna reach out and find new places to talk and such. idk i think i surrounded myself with some things that are the opposite of what i want on the internet. aka freedom. like idk ive restricted myself to like 4 discord servers despite being on like 70. thats mostly why i wanna branch out into different servers and possibly the hsd. i just sorta feel trapped and am trying to change that. onto the next thing
ive decided im going to get a guitar for my birthday which is coming up soon (august 9th), im gonna be 16 and ive always wanted to be a musician. ive never learnt any music so this is an opportunity to learn some shit and yaknow what im gonna fucking take it. im hoping to learn somewhat quickly but thats just high hopes. i spend pretty much all day everyday listening to new and different music so music is something im really really pationate about already.
and uh yeah. thats pretty much whats been up. ill maybe be posting more. seeya in space cowboy
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7/20/17 @10:59 am - so. idk im in a rut. im trying to find meaning in my life. there's a few things in my life that are giving me the slightest bit of meaning right now. its mostly making this site, listening to new music, and talking to online friends. i pretty much have sat inside everyday for the last week or so just kinda....sucking. not doing anything. no fucking upward movement except for this site getting bigger, and my music library getting bigger.
i go on a walk like every day just to kinda...idk explore. exploring is one of my favorite things to do honestly. just to kinda get out of the house and walk around and see things ive never seen before, or maybe even walk past firmiliar things and see them in a new light. i usually walk around with headphones in and listen to music. yesterday i listened to in the aeroplane over the sea, today i think im gonna listen to loveless. just good music to walk around and be calm too. i usually take photos when i walk around (*maybe ill include some at the end of this post???) its a lot of fun. i forgot how much i love photography. finding an old abandoned building and taking a few photos is really nice. today i found this castle sorta place with a bridge outside it by ucc (university cork college). i was gonna take some photos but i decided i didnt want to cuz i wanted to upload them to my mastadon (which i was waiting to get because i was waiting for a regestration time for a certain instance)
speaking of mastadon, i recently switched my microblogging to mastadon. just last night actually. i wanted to join a really cool instance, i knew that it would be apart of my url so i was really looking for one that caught my intrest. a few did those being anticapitalist.party (because fuck capitalism!!), and cybre.space (becuase thats a cool url, its a cyberpunk instance, and they have a bunch of alterations to the usually mastadon formula.). i went with cybre.space of course. i couldnt actually go with anticapitalist.party because the instance doesnt seem to be open to new users at the moment. cybre.space on the other hand is open to users but only 1 hour per day. so i had to wait till 2 am to join it lol. but i really like it, i like the changes made to it from the vanilla mastadon. and i also like what it stands for. mastadon seems like something im gonna like a lot more that twitter, but i have a few things im not sure about. the #1 thing i have an issue with is that it seems theres no archive feature? twitter at least let you download an archive of your tweets, but an instane can go down at any time so its kinda a bit scarier than twitter. never the less lets see how mastadon plays out for me. you can follow me here
other than mastadon ive ventured into a few other websites, both music related. ive been wanting grow my music taste for a while now. and ive slowly been doing it but theres still a lot of room left to grow. anyway i made a last.fm and a rym just because thats what /mu/ seems to recomend, heres my rym and heres my last.fm. im new to both sites so be easy on me. but i gotta say theyre both very useful, last.fm litterally tracks all music you listen to and gives you recomendations, and rym tracks your library and ratings. sadly most of my library is digital since i pretty much get most of my music library off soulseek lol.
i really havent hung out with anyone in a week or so now. im sorta feeling lonely but ill be out of this in time. its just what happens when you stop being close with someone i guess (lets try to avoid that subject). ill pull through but yeah. maybe ill do something with my friends sometime soon. honestly i just wanna hang out in the woods and chill lol.
also i havent slept at all through this entire night and its like 10 am now fuck.
anyway, i leave you with *the photos i mentioned earlier (theyre all quite shit and theyre in a 1;1 aspect ratio because i dont feel like trying to get the correct aspect ratio and downsized image in html)
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